For the past two weeks I’ve gone HAM on Green Library. I hope you’ve enjoyed it, I’m sure plenty did not, but it’s time to do something different. Unlike the infinite number of graduate students regurgitating mashed peas and the post-structural musings of Foucault and Derrida like a group of abandoned babbling infants, I’m going to attempt something different. I’m going to offer a solution. I know, I know, who do I think I am? How could anyone possibly try to fix or change anything in this godforsaken hell hole of the post-modern dystopia? I’ll try my hand.