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Downsizing

You have an option. The world’s brightest minds have discovered a way to shrink humans down to only 5 inches tall as an answer to overpopulation. Not only does it reduce human consumption and waste, but the procedure comes with a dramatic increase in the value of the individual’s money (an 8-inch car is much cheaper to…

Frame of reference

On Nov. 3, the new iPhone X was released into the wild. Chaos and commotion ensued. Whether it was the iPhone “10” or “ex” did not matter to the hundreds of people standing in line outside the Apple store at the Stanford Shopping Center at four in the morning. I wasn’t one of those people.…

What did you say?

“Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.” This meaningless sentence was coined by Noam Chomsky, an American linguist and philosopher. It’s a perfect example of how a sentence can be grammatically correct yet have no semantic meaning whatsoever. On first glance, I thought it was some deep metaphor. Memories of English class came flooding back, hours spent…

To plan or not to plan

I sat outside of Tresidder Union, staring at my laptop, hoping some brilliant transition sentence would flow through my fingertips and into my essay that hadn’t changed in the last hour. Two girls walked past, playfully in conversation: “You should have a four year plan.” “No, because things change all the time.” I had a…