Happy Friday the 13th! Getting seven years of bad luck sucks, so don’t break any mirrors or walk under any ladders (EANABS!). But if you do, at least you’ll be better off than these people.

 

The babies in Babyoncé’s maternity ward

Allegedly Beyoncé and Jay-Z locked down the entire sixth floor in New York’s Lenox Hill Hospital to welcome this century’s power baby. An expectant mother reported being turned away, but seemed quite forgiving when reminiscing how she caught a glimpse of Blue Ivy Carter. My undelivered baby would wait in line for that too.

 

Coachella.com’s webmasters

This is not a good week for the poor souls who manage Coachella’s website, which has struggled to stay up and running since the lineup was released Monday. With the remaining $285 tickets on sale today, I can only imagine a room full of frazzled, body-painted hipsters trying to keep up with Internet traffic.

 

Jon Huntsman

Despite an endorsement from the Boston Globe (a slight to former Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney) and the media bouncing around the “dark horse” card, the only sane candidate left in the GOP race still hasn’t caught that crucial break. Jon Huntsman, stay away from ladders. And black cats. And especially Michele Bachmann. That one’s just common sense.

 

Golden Globe Nominees

They feel lucky now, but wait until Jan. 15, when they’re at the mercy of returning host Ricky Gervais. True, he doesn’t have as easy targets as Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie, awkwardly nominated in the comedy/musical categories for “The Tourist.” But let’s be real: it’s Ricky Gervais. Nominees best be practicing their “look-I-can-laugh-at-myself-but-secretly-I-want-to-murder-you” smiles.

 

Twinkie lovers

Hostess is filing for bankruptcy a second time. I mean, you probably shouldn’t be eating Twinkies or Wonder Bread, but what would a world be like without them? Probably healthier and less at risk for heart attacks, but sad. Quite sad.