Friday night ‘Gaieties’ audience out of line

Like many upperclassmen, I attended Gaieties this past Friday.  And perhaps like many of my fellow students who sat near the back that night, my experience was ruined by about eight males (I refuse to call them men) who found it necessary to shout sexual obscenities every half minute.  The most common line was “Show us your tits,” which by the end of the night I had heard at least 50 times.

My initial reaction was revulsion at the indecency of these males, at least half of whom were members of the Sigma Chi fraternity.  Yes, Gaieties is a show with nudity, but anyone going to the show exclusively for that end should just take their $10 to a porn site.  Instead, these males showed up and treated the lead actress as if she was nothing more than a body meant to pleasure them.  Objectification of women is nothing new in our society.  But if you’re smart enough to get into Stanford, and you’ve spent at least a couple years on our relatively tolerant campus, surely you should be able to realize why treating women (or anyone) in such a manner is not okay.  Not only does it violate the fundamental standard, it violates common sense.

And yet, after reflecting on this incident for the past two days, I’ve come to not only blame those males.  After all, what did I do?  At one point I mumbled, “Grow the f*ck up.”  But I never shouted back.  I never asked the security team to have them removed.  And I didn’t confront them after the show was over.  To my knowledge, no one else stood up to them either, although I bet that I was not the only one disturbed by their incessant shouting.  Not only did other students tolerate such behavior, some went so far as to actively promote it; about halfway through the show, someone in the orchestra pit held up a sign reading, “Boobs glorious boobs.”

I walked out of Memorial Auditorium distraught, and this blog post is an attempt for me to gain some closure on that night.  The fact that these males were so obscene and disrespectful deeply concerns me.  Not every male at Stanford treats women like that, but at least a vocal minority does.  And the fact that “innocent” students allowed this behavior to continue and, in some cases, promoted it discourages me even more.

What happened that Friday is in the past, but I worry that it is just the tip of the iceberg.  If that is what these males can do in public and get away with, I only wonder what happens behind closed doors.  In that vein, I think I speak for many students when I say that it is time we hear some firsthand accounts of how these types of students act in private.  Yes, sharing one’s story may in some cases betray a pledge of secrecy, but far more important than any fabricated allegiance is the allegiance we owe to each other as human beings.

 

Were you at the Friday night show?   If so, share your thoughts below or email Adam at adamj11@stanford.edu

About Author

Adam Johnson

Adam is a senior from Illinois. He is majoring in Biomechanical Engineering, although his intellectual interests span dozens of departments. This is his second year writing for the Daily (you may remember him from his work last year on the Editorial Board). Outside of writing, Adam enjoys acting, skiing, making music, and thrift-store shopping. View all Articles by Adam Johnson →

  • StanfordNYCAlum

    This article is the equivalent of a passive aggressive note left for your room mate. How about next time you actually do something? It only takes one person to say something, the rest of the audience would have fallen in line behind you. You’re just as responsible for this culture as the perpetrators are.

  • @Adam

    From what I understand the hecklers are a part of the cast. They are at every show.

  • Gaieties staff member

    I won’t comment on the article overall for the moment, but as a member of the Gaieties musical staff, I want to establish two things:

    1. to the commenter above — the hecklers are very much not part of the cast; I don’t know if you said that in jest, but had you been at the show Wednesday or Thursday you would know the audiences were significantly quieter those two nights, and certainly much less obscene. I find it bemusing that you imply we would stage a show only to essentially undermine all our hard work by not only mocking it, but also rendering it inaudible.

    2. The sign from the pit orchestra were very much not an encouragement of our lewder audience members. In context, it was part of a procession of silly signs which only intended to play off of the bawdy, fun atmosphere of the Friday night show. Moreover, the sign you reference was a direct quote from the show — in other words, it certainly didn’t venture into territory any more ribald than the show itself, or endorse such a provocation, but rather meant to poke fun at, and stay in the spirit of, the goofy if risque humor of Gaieties as a whole.

  • dapotatoman

    I absolutely agree with this. Why did you not just simply confront these males? You obviously knew who they were when you called them out for being sigma chi. You hold the entire campus, including those boys, to a higher standard than you hold yourself. A blog post urging others to confront the problem does not excuse your lack of action.

  • jjceleste

    It is perfectly understandable that the author did not want to confront the rowdy frat boys. If he had, he might have caused the disruption to escalate–and that would only have hurt the performers more. It is complicated whether speaking out or standing down is a better response to a difficult situation. Every day, in interactions large and small, we make these decisions, often in seconds. Although I would never, ever compare the severity of the two, by your reasoning, those who didn’t confront the Nazis are as culpable as the Nazis themselves. Come on…does that really make sense?

  • Adam Johnson

    I didn’t know their names, and if I had I would probably have reported it as a fundamental standard violation. I figured at least half were in Sigma Chi because I knew Sigma Chi was sitting right in front of us. I almost went up to ask their names at the end of the show, but at that point I honestly just wanted to leave.

    How I am holding them to a higher standard than I hold myself is beyond me. I think respecting people is a pretty basic standard, and I feel absolutely awful when I do not live up to that. If anything, I’d like to think that I hold a higher standard for myself than I hold for other people.

    And why I didn’t confront them is something I am struggling with. I said as much in the article, which makes me wonder if NYCAlum read it all the way through. Am I more culpable because I knew what they were doing was wrong and perhaps they didn’t? Possibly. But to criticize this article because I didn’t stand up to them in the moment is dodging the core of what happened. Yes, I was probably wrong to not act on my sentiments, but what they did was wrong too- I think ignoring that side of the equation is irresponsible.

  • StanfordNYCAlum

    I read the whole thing. Your article seems to shift focus away from yourself. I understand you were upset that and were struggling with the fact that you did nothing, but writing this article isn’t redemption. What’s your call to action here? To get people to share gossip about some guys? That is the most passive aggressive thing I’ve ever heard. This is not the way.

    I am not attempting to shift blame away from the perverted hecklers. Based on your account their actions were reprehensible. So much so that letting it slide also becomes reprehensible. My tone comes off harsh, but what I really hope to achieve is an understanding that the person who willingly allows oppression is also an oppressor.

    To address the commenter saying “Although I would never, ever compare the severity of the two, by your reasoning, those who didn’t confront the Nazis are as culpable as the Nazis themselves.” Let me inform you that you just did, in fact, compare the severity of those two things. This was not a life or death situation, he stood to lose nothing. Worst case you interrupt the show for two minutes? That tradeoff is worth it if it helps shuts down this type behavior.

  • Nice job Adam

    I don’t see why you’re picking on Adam. Adam feels bad about not doing something *at the time*. But then he went and wrote a whole op-ed piece about the incident, using his real name, for all to see and judge. I’d say that’s upstanding, responsible, even brave. I guess if he were *perfect* or, say, had a time machine, he could have done slightly better and confronted the hecklers verbally at the time. But I don’t expect perfection of others any more than of myself: only honest effort and thoughtfulness. Adam does both here.

  • Fed up at Stanford

    “show us your tits” has been a part Gaieties as long as administrators have been involved– 2 years ago, expecting the shot-out, Dean Julie even wore a trench coat which she “ripped open” to reveal “BEAT CAL” across her chest.

    This is yet another example of

    a) the cowardice of internet-dwellers who are unwilling (and unable) to be a MAN (ironic that you would not call them such, when you clearly demonstrate equal deficiencies) and simply confront another person face to face

    b) Stanford students attempting to sterilize our culture into a politically correct petri dish where everyone can grow and develop in a completely non-offensive, totally supportive, COMPLETELY UNREALISTIC environment.

    Good luck in the real world, bet your future boss will absolutely love a passive aggressive, internet-bully, coward of an employee.

  • Gaieties alum

    Great, let’s continue the trend of killing absolutely everything fun, kooky, or controversial about Stanford. Anyone who’s ever been to Gaeities knows “show us your tits” is a standard audience heckle that has a long tradition of being part of the show.

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